did you ever feel guilty

by Jemmy 5th April 2009, 4:51 pm

Ever since yesterday I've been feeling really guilty. Just can't get outta my head what they surgeon said to me.

Am I being totally unreasonable wanting bigger boobs when I'm not tiny or need it for health reasons. It's all I've been thinking about.

I still feel small for the size of my shoulders and want bigger boobs but my head seems to be thinking about what everyone keeps telling me. Do I need more confidence or should I go thru with it.

So confused

X

by moonmar 5th April 2009, 5:01 pm

Hun, I never felt guilty... true, I was flat, but, like most girls here, I also didn't need it for medical purposes. It something you are doing for yourself and no one else, if you feel the need for it, you are right to do it no matter what everyone else says.
You are also right in taking your time to think about it. Maybe sometimes we decide that we don't like a part of our body because we have never tried to love it. I tried to love my previous boobs, believe me! But when I realised that it wasn't possible and I would always hate them, then I had to have a BA. it's totally personal and no one else can tell you what is unreasonable or not for you!
Don't let other people influence you - and at the same time don't rush your decision... just make sure it's what you want and then there won't be any need to feel guilty!
Good luck hun xxx

by Jemmy 5th April 2009, 5:14 pm

Thanks moonmar!

Sometimes I do like them which is usually around time of the month cos I bloat that much they get bigger. But soon as it's over I hate them again. Can stand in front of the mirror for ages trying to think of good things about them but then it always comes back to, ewwww their too small

by Mia 5th April 2009, 5:22 pm

Jemmy, as MM has just said I second!!! It needs to feel right for you!!! You will just know when/ if the time is right for you. It seems like noone around you is happy with what you are thinking and that of course makes you feel quite sad/silly, especially when they are the most important people to us. But it is your feeelings, your body and your decision. Try to think ahead, say you now have boobs that you want.. how does that make you feel? perhaps that may help in your decision-making. Thinking of you Hug

xx

by Jemmy 5th April 2009, 5:36 pm

I do stuff my bra wit socks 2 try and get a rough idea as to what I would look like with bigger boobs. Apart from them looking slightly odd, I love the feeling of having these 2 big bumps infront of me. It jus feels right like they should always be there.

Am loving the thought of overs now as well. Before I went to see ps I was determined 2 have unders n drains and after seeing him and him explaining how unders would be perfect for me I'm excited.

by Mia 5th April 2009, 6:05 pm

Think you are in the process of making the decision Jemmy!! Maybe go for a couple more consultations, weigh up all the opinions and facts with your feelings and whatever you feel then will be the right decision for you make. Thinking of you xx Hug

by Jemmy 5th April 2009, 6:43 pm

Yea I agree. I've gotta wait for a letter from the ps to come with all the info we discussed yesterday. So i'm gun sit down with the OH when it comes and read through it all carefully.

Then I'll need to book another consultation to try on implants with the nurse.

Heart

by Mia 5th April 2009, 6:45 pm

Good for you Jemmy!!! One step at a time

xx

by Jemmy 5th April 2009, 6:49 pm

I didn't think for one minute I would come out of there feeling like I do.

He shocked me when he said it's a shame I can't gain more confidence than have surgery! You could have blown me over with a feather!

by Loxxie 5th April 2009, 7:27 pm

hey there Jemmy,may i ask who you had your consult with+did you feel comfortable with him/trust him? x

by Jemmy 5th April 2009, 7:56 pm

I had Mr Cooper from Spire Cardiff. Absolutely lovely guy, was very calm and honest!

Maybe a little too honest for what I wanted to hear but good all the same.

My friend recommended him said he is very thorough.

by **nads** 5th April 2009, 8:57 pm

I didnt feel guilty, no but you've seen how flat i was but like MM said we dont NEED this surgery, its elective so its normal to have these feelings. I know loads of girls who've been b/c/d/dd cups and gotten BAs, they arent just for flat girls at all. Maybe your ps is just used to seeing really flat girls come in. But if you're not happy with your breasts the size is irrelevent really xxx

by Jemmy 6th April 2009, 12:05 pm

He did say to me that he has a lot more women who go to see him with far less than what I was given.

I just try and think of the whole community of people who have BA's and remind myself that there are people who are bigger than me and have implants.

Feeling a lot better today. Who would have thought it would be such an emotional rollercoaster.

by em_stevo 6th April 2009, 12:13 pm

Jemmy what size are u at the moment and what are you hoping to go to? (sorry if you already posted that somewhere else). I was a 32B and wasnt necesserily flat or they werent misshaped or anythin, i went to a consultation with a surgeon from the nuffield and i told him that my OH wasnt happy with my decision as he felt i didnt need them doing, and when he looked at mine he said, i can understand where your other half is coming from, i mean what sort of thing is that to say??? I was gutted. The only thing that matters is that you know how you feel, if your not happy then theres nothing anyone can say!!!

by Jemmy 6th April 2009, 12:45 pm

Well I'm wearing a 36b bra at the moment. I don't fill it always have a gap at the top. I measured myself last week and it came out as a 38A.

I'm not flat by any means. But to me their triangular n pointy whereas I want rounder fuller boobs and because I have broad shoulders I think it makes me look worse.

Everyone tells me I'm fine as I am. LOL. But my belly sticks out further than me boobs. Gotta laugh.

by Jemmy 6th April 2009, 12:47 pm

I want to go to a D cup but not look massive and out of proportion

by emrussell79 6th April 2009, 2:16 pm

Hiya hun, i never once felt guilty as although i didnt "need" the op, i needed it for happiness. That may sound daft but i was fed up every day, i hated getting dressed as i had to pad myself out so much and couldnt wear anything low cut incase anyone saw down my top it was awful. I had the op for me but also the sake of my kids and hubby as i was so so misserable and i wanted to be a happy mum and wife and now i am x

by Jemmy 6th April 2009, 2:49 pm

Hiya emrussell

It's nice to hear people having the same experience. I don't think the ps said it to be frank or nasty I think he was just being a good surgeon.

In one way I'm glad he was so honest as it shows he cares for his patients.

by natalia 6th April 2009, 3:32 pm

hi jemmy i to was a small b cup u shouldnt feel guilty mine to were pert but im althlectic built and felt boyish and not on proportion so i was unhappy i wanted them dun for years was just to scared till i saw my friends was jealous every time i saw her big boobs it was then i booked courgage and had them done i kno i would be unhappy if i didnt u shouldnt feel guilty if it will make u happy its so worth it
xx

by Mia 6th April 2009, 3:37 pm

Hi Jemmy,
Glad you feel better today!!! If it is any consolation most pics I have seen were bigger before op than mine after!!! It is you and how you feel that matters, You should not feel guilty, other people are not living your feelings are they? I am sure all the ladies on here have lived with similar and different feelings. If you truly want them then get them, other people will always have their own ideas. Hug

x

by Jemmy 6th April 2009, 3:39 pm

Yea bugger other people. As long as I'm happy that's all that matters.

X

by Mia 6th April 2009, 3:52 pm

That's it you go girl

by **nads** 6th April 2009, 3:54 pm

Exactly! x

by annefinackapan 6th April 2009, 5:26 pm

My friend had lovely 34b boobs but desperatly wanted them bigger, her mum went with her to the consult and told the PS 'she doesnt need this done' (typical defensive mum) he said ' why have a Fiat when you can have a Farrari?'

Couldnt say it better myself........!

xx (me I had a robin reliant but thats another story!)

by Jemmy 6th April 2009, 5:50 pm

annefinackapan wrote:My friend had lovely 34b boobs but desperatly wanted them bigger, her mum went with her to the consult and told the PS 'she doesnt need this done' (typical defensive mum) he said ' why have a Fiat when you can have a Farrari?'

Couldnt say it better myself........!

xx (me I had a robin reliant but thats another story!)

Wow if only I had thought that a Saturday.

Well you're never going to believe this but ... I just spoke to my friend who had her BA with the ps I saw on Saturday and guess what??? He said totally the same to her about not really needing a BA!!!

Would you **naughty word** believe it! Oh well least i'm not the only one on the planet now that's been told that! Phew

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did you ever feel guilty

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