How do I tell my parents?

Hi everyone

Got a dilemma, I went for consultation last week and have booked a date for BAbut haven't said anything to my parents as they are away at the moment (been in Cyprus for the last three months both retired). Any advice would be useful -don't know whether to tell them over the phone or wait til they get back (25th june).

Hmm that's a tough one. Do you think the will react badly? Or be supportive?

I did it face to face although its personal preference. They have plenty of time to get used to the idea. Let us know how you get on

I'm not too sure - mum might go mad with me but then again she could want me to be happy, I think my dad would say go for it if it's what I want.
Thanks guys think I might wait til they get back from holiday and tell them that weekend

Good luck x

Hey
Just told my parents and they've gone mad at me for wanting a boob job, they want me to save for a deposit for a house!!!! I wish I hadn't said anything now :( and just had it done - it's not as if I'm a kid anymore I'm 33 so should be able to do things without asking them

Aww huni x it's hard for parents sometimes! And they do worry. Give them some time, they may come around to the idea. X

I'm sure they will come round to the idea

Im sure they'll come around. Every parent is the same they think there lil girl (at any age) is perfect. Just explain how you feel to them and that its something you need to do for yourself x

If you're planning on telling your parents hun then I'd suggest you do it face to face. Get yourself prepared with all your research because without doubt they're going to be worried and your research and showing that you're being sensible about choosing your surgeon and clinic will hopefully help them to feel a little better about your decision.

But do keep in mind when your telling them hun that you're telling them out of respect moor them and not out of wanting their approval. You're a grown woman now and whether they agree with your decision or not, its not that that matters. You feel they should know and your telling them... Anything after that really is your business babe. Hopefully they will share your journey with you though. Xx

Like cookie said, you told them because you didn't want to keep it from them, put of respect but you've done the research, you know how you feel about your boobs per BA and for you, your doing the right thing, yer they worry but once you've had your BA, there see that your still their daughter and will relax a lot more!! I think when we tell our parents they think we all want to have huge boobs when most of the time we don't, we just want to feel happy , congrats on your date xx

Thanks everyone for your responses - whilst at the gym I had a text from parents to say sorry and it was a bit of a shock. I memtioned it to a few of the girls at the gym who had had it done and they've said mum will come roundhopefully sooner rather than later.

My mum did that too Hun, reacted badly then txt me in the night to say sorry and she would support me no matter what. Glad they seem to be coming around now, it must be a shock

Thankfully my parents have been great but iv always been quite independent in my decision making from them, tho i do really care what they say and take their reactions to heart. I would say face to face too tgat way they can tell how much it means to u rather than a message or hone call. Xx good luck xx

I'm so pleased they are coming round to the idea x luckily my parents were fine with it, they had been aware I wanted a BA for a very long time x

I'm sorry to hear your parents reacted like that. As a parent myself my children are beautiful in my eyes and nothing needs changing about them. They will be just a little taken back by it esp if you have not mentioned it before, I'm sure they will come to accept your decision in time.
I never told my Dad as he would of felt uncomfortable with the surgical aspect and naturally would try to convince me otherwise. My Mum knows but it's been something I have talked about for yonks and she was really happy for me! So difficult you can't please everyone, but the end of the day you are a grown women and you make your own choices in life to please you, that's the important thing to remember.

Well I have made the choice not to tell mine..... I feel awful but I'm hoping they won't really notice as iv always worn the most padded bra ever so to others I look big so if I told people they wouldn't understand why I wanted it done.
I felt really guilty the other day for not tellin them but if they notice I will tell them but for now I'm an emotional rollercoaster trying to get the money sorted before pre-op on Thursday so better for me the less people that know. My boyfriend is giving me all the support I need at the moment and the ladies on here have kept me going xx

Hey hope things have smoothed out now after telling your parents? Xx

You've no need to feel guilt Kitty. This is a life decision you've made for yourself. I'm sure your parents don't feel obligated to discuss their life decisions with you hun, so don't feel you have to with them. You're all adults and as long as your choice doesn't affect their lives in any way, which this won't, then you're doing nothing wrong at all in not telling them lovely.

I chose not to tell my parents about my last two ops. Simply because I didn't want to. There are lots of us on here who haven't told our parents Kitty so don't feel you're alone at all sweetheart. Xx

Thankyou so much that's made me feel so much better. I think it was just a stage I went through I'm really happy I haven't told people like you said I am doing this for me and nobody else xxx

My parent didn't react particularly well either hun, but my mum came round eventually it was just because she was worried.
My dad even said to me on the morning of my op "I don't really approve of this but if its what u want to do" which made me feel awful 2 hrs before going to theatre, but he is fine now and has seen the change in me since!
I hope your parents are feeling better about it now.
Maybe offer to take your mum to a consultation with ur surgeon, this helped to relax my mum. Xx

kitty87 wrote:Thankyou so much that's made me feel so much better. I think it was just a stage I went through I'm really happy I haven't told people like you said I am doing this for me and nobody else xxx

That's OK hun. I think its VERY important for women to go through surgery without people laying 'guilt trips' on them for their choices.

Having a cosmetic procedure isn't an open door that everybody has automatic right to open. Its a private thing and we should each have the option to tell who we like if we choose to tell anyone at all.

My pet hate is the expression "I don't want to lie.. I want to be honest about my BA"

I personally would NEVER sit and have a chat about my boobs with my parents or anyone else for that matter, so in NOT telling them, I'm just being me! I'm NOT lying, I'm NOT being dishonest, its just how I, and how many women like me just are. I didnt have a personality change! I changed my boobs! So I'm not going to change who I am and suddenly become that person who wants to sit and talk boobs with friends and family. For some women this is what they want to do and that's fine, that's their choice, but don't ever feel pressured to be that person too babe. You be who YOU are and stand by your own choices - they're NOT wrong. Xx

Thanks cookie you have just explained exactly how I feel and you put it in better words than I ever could. I just told my boyfriend about the shout out at the top and the new topic you did for me he said aww that's great. Thankyou so much for your support I couldn't of been calm and happy today without all you great ladies xx

Awwww you're very welcome hun xx

Hey,
Thanks for the replies - since telling my parents, we haven' t actually spoken about it again . I think they're leaving me to it now as they won't talkme out of it!!! as at present I don't want to buy any new bras if I'm only going to wear them for three/four months before having to buy new again in new size after BA in october.