Any Embarrasing moments

Kids are so funny. My son learnt a new word at school one day and came home and said "I think my daddy is a W****r" I said "Fair comment son but a) you're not allowed to say that word and b) where the hell have you heard it?" He said his mate had been calling it to him all day and he thought it was a kind thing to call someone

Arrr bless him thats sweet, in a way. I am just starting to teach my daughter (10 years old) a few thing about the birds and the bees. Last night I tried to tell her where a baby came out off. OMG her face. put me right of telling her anymore for a bit

Oh I've got a funny story...will keep it short (lol)

Years ago my son and daughter were in the bath together, my daughter was asking baby making questions and I explained that the man gives the woman his seeds (it's what we called my sons bits) and the woman grows the seeds in her tummy until the baby is ready. My daughter took a long hard look at my sons bits and said "Mummy how do I get the seeds into my tummy coz they're a bit big for me to swallow) bless her little heart. If I remember rightly I just walked away mumbling something along the lines of "don't ever swallow sweetie"

omg i cant stop laughing at all of these stories, the kids ones make me laugh the most. I dont have kids yet but my mum told me a funny story about me and my friend i made on holiday.
My mum had offered to take me and my friend down to the beach why her parents went on a day trip, there was a cafe on the beach and while we were waiting for our food me and my friend went to play in the sand. Mum said she looked up and saw me and my friend running full speed towards her in the cafe looking really pleased with ourselves whilst both holding a used condom that we had filled with sea water saying 'Look we found a water balloon!!' and bouncing it up and down.
She said all the other people were staring at her and as she realised what it was she screamed 'NOOOO put it down!!' and took us straight to the toilet to wash our hands.
Ew cant believe i touched that!!!! poor mum lol xxxx

Lol oh you wicked dirty little children!!!

I have another one from my son this time its not so funny but very cute.

Where my mum lives there is a boat dock. There used to be a very old, rather rusty submarine there, that had been brought up on to the dock that ppl could walk around etc etc. Anyway my son alwayssssss used to ask me to drive past it on the way to visit my mum. But his wording was. "Mum please could you take me to see the old dirty boat" and when he saw it his words where "oh mummy that boat needs a bath".
I still think its cute to this day

Oh bless him. when my son was young I said to him "oh it will be sad when you lose your cuteness", he then started sobbing so much. I asked what was wrong and he said "I don't want my cuteness to drop off"....lol I think he thought a body part was gonna come flying off one day!

My son is only 5 but full of wise remarks. One morning I came downstairs and started brushing my hair infront of the mirror. I noticed he was staring at me. I asked him if he was staring at me cos he thought I was beautiful and he replied, " no. You need to put make-up on to be beautiful!!!" He was serious too!

Lol flowergirl kids are so blunt.

My baby has got it into her head that when you say I'm goin to eat you cheeks, bum what ever she really thinks your going to do it. I didn't realize she thought that untill one day at my mums we where playing with her and she starting bawling her eyes out asking my to give it back, give it back. I managed to calm her down a little and asked her what do you want mummy to give back to you and she said my bum and cheeks please mummy give them back NOW.

Bless I felt so bad neither of my other two ever came up with that thought x

I was embarrased one day when a neighbour asked my son what he wanted to be when he grows up. My son came back with whatever it was, a fireman or something and the man said "oh that will be interesting to see if you actually do become what you want to be" and my son replied "well you won't know though will you because you will be dead by then!!!"

OMG Yetti what did your neighbour say to that? I bet they was a bit shocked lol

I've had so much fun reading all these, I was actually bursting out laughing with tears streaming down my cheeks. I so didn't want the stories to stop lol

Lol butterfly I think I mumbled something about his sick sense of humour....must take after his father lol.

Oh Becks that's the joy of life hun....the stories NEVER stop

I've got a billion in my memory back I just have to sober up long enough to remember them (I am joking of course, I'm a very responsible Mummy)

Oh i meant to say in my memory BANK. Durrr Note to self, check before pushing send button

I must say these also made me cry laughing. Keep em coming girls. The only one I can think of that happened to me was on a gilie holiday in loret de mar about 10 years ago. I can't swim but we had one of these float mats to hold onto and my friend was a good swimmer so she said we'd just stay in the shallow part where I could touch the floor and would save me if I got into touble. Well we didn't realise how big the waves were and even in the shallow part it grabbed the mat and me with it. All my friend said she could see was my legs in the air kicking about aimlessly (while my head was skimming the sand under the water) when I got to the shore I was able to stand, Confused I was looking at the beach, hearing giggles from my friend behind me, I turned round trying to look like I wasn't phased and no one would have noticed, when my friend burst out laughing. My top was round my neck showing my boobs to everyone. As I'd just been faceing the packed beach with my fried eggs out. Oh the shame, she wouldn't let me live it down all holiday.

I was once staying in a hotel and got really hammered. I went into the bathroom blurry eyed in the middle of the night and the door clicked really loudly. I opened my eyes fully and realised I was in the hallway totally starkers and locked out of my room. The worst thing was that this was a team building weekend and I didn't know whos door to knock on and didn't want to risk it being a male colleague so I had to go down to reception in th buff. I managed to pull two leaves off a cheese plant to semi hide my modesty. The guy on reception was funny he gave me his jacket and let me back into my room but not before telling me he'd seen me on the CCTV with the rest of the hotel security men. Talk about mortified!

peachy omg... thats my worst nightmare!! Poor you hahahaha... funny story now though

omg peachy that is hilarious, im soo sorry that happened to you, but its fricken funny. nice he gave you his jacket...

omg peachy thats hilarious!!!!!!! xxxxx

Lol oh that is sooo embarrassing, you poor thing. I used to work at Gatwick airport and they always used to call me loret del mar because it sounded like my name (Yvette DeBarr) :-)

Ooh my reply was to earlier message lol.

Oh Peachy that's awful. I worked in a Hotel and one night a couple had a massive row and the bloke botted his gf out of the room naked!!! She pulled down one of the curtains in the hall and came down to reception. We billed them for the damage

When my son was about four he was being bullied at school by a boy who lived over the road, one morning my husband was washing his car with my son and Robert (the boy over the road) was sitting on the kerb sucking his thumb, my hubby said to my son " look Robert's not that tough son, he's a thumb sucker". Well mom & dad in law were babysitting that evening and my son filled them in on what was happening with Robert, and told them that daddy had said "he's not so tough, he's a dumb ******!!" - Well to this day, we still have a giggle about this every now and then and they still don't believe when I say it was thumb sucker.

Lol that is soooo funny!!!!

My son told my parents only recently that his Daddy has lots of porn at home. He said he eats it all the time!!!! Lol I think he meant something else but we're still not sure what.

Another one courtesy of my son, he used to calls his parts his bulbs and was extremely upset one day when my childminders' husband, who was a very keen gardener asked my son to come and help him to plant his bulbs in the garden. My son said he would help if that's what he wanted, but he wasn't planting his.

Tee hee so funny!