Has anyone told about BA and had a bad reaction?

So I already know there are loads of people in my family who "disapprove" of BA because my sister in law had one and people have said tons of stuff about her behind her back... some of it to me as they don't realise I am planning to have one too.

So, have any of you had bad reactions from people (particularly family) when they've found out after you've had it done, or even for those of you who told them before you've had it done? Or, has anyone managed to keep it a secret altogether?!

I'm going ahead with it regardless of course... but, I hate that I should have to justify myself to people when it's none of their business.

LL
x

Yea i have had loads of stick, my dad thinks its unneccesary and is giving me the silent treatment, my mu has said that she thinks that im selfish and as a mother any and all moey i have should be spent on my kids, she sais i only think of myself because i am doing something for myself, my nan just refuses to talk about it and it is **naughty word**.
My friend seems ok about it but my other friend who wants one done desperatly has stopped talking to me all together!

it sucks :tears:
But im using all that as inspiration to just do me and be happy... in the grand scheme of things it doesnt change a thing

Only two people know about my BA LL - somebody I have known for around 35 years, but when I moved out from London I lost contact with her, but managed to connect again when I found her on FB - and she was thrilled for me.
My best friend just said, "if you're happy with it" and refused to discuss it any further - didn't even phone or text me whilst I was in hospital having it done - but we've met up a couple of times since and she's fine about it now (she's still bigger than me the b***h LOL). However, she's touchy about boobies which I think is down to losing her mother to breast cancer, so this would explain her reticence in wanting to talk about it I suppose, so I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt as I don't want us to fall out about it.
Another close friend, who also does my hair (she used to work for me many years ago when I owned a salon, but we were all friends, it wasn't a boss/worker type situation) will see me next Friday when I go to see her, so it will be interesting to see if she notices and what she might say if she does.
xx

Argh, Candy... that sounds just like my OH's side when they were talking about my S-I-L's implants. They were saying how selfish because of her kid and stuff... it's exactly what would be said about me, but the point is that if my kids were going to be going without, I wouldn't be doing it. They get absolutely everything they could need, and one is 2 and the other 6 months, so they're spoiled rotten anyway!!

The only person really losing out is my OH because he wants a brand new phone... and his own car... and the new Xbox Kinect... etc, etc... lol. He shall just have to wait!

Oh dear Carol, I can understand really if your friend is sensitive about the subject... but generally speaking I don't really understand people's friends getting upset and ignoring them over it... surely you aren't friends with a person because of the size of their breasts?! What does it matter if they change them? I wouldn't ignore my friend for months because she dyed her hair red or something... it just doesn't make sense to me... Family-wise, I guess the same rules should apply, but I think generally family members tend to expect you to have a similar moral code to them, and friends don't really impose those sorts of things...

I don't know... "Sunnyside would be totally cool and groovy if we all just got along!!"...

(Toy Story 3 has been on constant repeat for weeks and is invading my brain at every opportunity)

LL
x

It's funny coz I got kicked out when I was 18 and haven't really spoken to any of my family since. I did get into contact with my brother but then he start talking to me like crap so I dropped him again. Throughout uni and early adult life I've had to struggle a little bit more than others without their support but it actually suits me very well. I don't like them and I can do what the hell I want and not have to worry about anybody's judgement. And that for me is a major bonus! So I feel bad for you guys having to worry about this stuff. Me, I just do what I want and I don't give a crap! But you guys, especially with close friends thinking that somehow, you getting a BA is completely relative to you being bad mothers....well that's rubbish. I think it says more about them than it does about you. Stay strong. You know who you are!

Beside I think that it's better for your kids to see that their mother is happy and confident and not to let things stand in your way. If you want something; go for it. And let your children see you have the guts to do it!

Wow HighMain that sounds tough, but you obviously get what you want from life so good on you!

LL - I have 2 young kids and totally understand the Toy Story obsession! "You gotta a friend in meeeee"

Going back to your question - I did have a bad reaction from one of my friends who I've known for years! She's currently still not speaking to me, despite me deliberately not expecting her to talk about my boobs. I think with her its jealousy, she would love to have a BA but cant afford to and also her husband doesnt support it.

My sister was also not supportive at first - she told me that she felt her job, as someone who loves me, was to talk me out of it! But she came around very quickly. I didnt challenge her much on her views and just kept explaining that it would make me happy, and now she has accepted. Although she still has not embraced my experience like my other sister (who has bigger boobs!) who loves seeing them!

I also worried about telling my dad, but he surprised me and has been great!

I havent told my in-laws. Mostly as I think they would react like yours! They are always talking about how poor they are and hate seeing us buy anything new!

So I think you're probably right to not tell the people you know will react badly. And then if they notice a difference after and ask you about it you could just say you knew they wouldnt approve and didnt want them spoiling your enjoyment. Then hopefully they'll reflect on their actions. Although probably always talk behind your back!

Good luck!

I think you guys all have got it right, its a mixture of jealousy, resentment and just standard interfering.
I am a mum and my kids are totally spoiled with everything they have asked for they always have been and there needs are always taking care of, Im only doing this because im in a place where i can afford to do this without having to go without, its the right time for me and my family. I made a BIG deal at christmas and went WAY over the top over compensated as i knew i was having my BA 1st of feb so they couldnt even ask for anything more because they already have it, this is about me and after 4 kids 3 c-sections and a twin pregnancy all in 4 year (yes one after the other after the other loool) I DESERVE THIS! and my boobies agree lol

This is something im doing with or without them, i just wouldnt want this to come between us, their choice though not mine.

*Highmaintainance- I think you have totally the right idea though, id up and flee in the middle of the night if i thought it would make a difference, knowing my mum she would only hunt me down and harras me more
Screw them hooray for us, making positive changes

Girls gotta do what a girls gotta do...

Blow what everyone else thinks... its your body, your life, your decision at the end of the day... yeh sure listen to positive advice coming from postive folk who genuinely have your best interests at heart.. but as for everyone else... forget the negative poisionous things they have to say as its probably coming from a dark negative place...

Thats what I have learnt in my experience of all this....

Be true to yourselves girls....

xx :thumbs:

It's so strange... I've always lived with that attitude about my small boobs luvlea... you know, "who cares what people say, this is my body and if I want to wear tight fitting clothes I will..." etc etc...
On the one hand people respect that, but on the other, I've always, always had comments about being skinny, being flat-chested, being anorexic (I am no-where near anorexic, I just don't have any hips!), etc etc... funnily enough it's always comments from women as well!! Men never seem to have a problem lol.

I could never care less what anybody random has to say about me, they don't matter a jot. And to be honest, anyone I meet in the future probably won't even guess I've had it done anyway because I don't really intend to let them "hang out" as such. I just want them there for me (and OH) and to wear all the clothes I'd like to be able to wear. I can't even put on a standard strappy top without it dangling down over my bra like I'm a 10 year old... I'm sick of it!!

I love my children more than anything and I hate the suggestion that I'm setting a bad example to them or being selfish... people say that it's hypocritical to tell your children to love themselves for who they are "but by the way mummy's had her boobs done", and I kind of feel like I have no reply to that.

grrr.... It's not like I'm doing drugs or something!! why does having a boob job have to make me feel so excited and happy, yet at the same time like I'm a bad person in certain people's eyes! It's driving me crazy and I'm sorry that some of you girls are also going through similar things!!

**tears hair out**

LL
x

Hi, I had my BA on Tuesday. I had a bump removed from my nose around 3 years ago and told my family, friends and workmates. I asked my friends not to tell anyone else but low and behold, a girl I hardly knew(who would not have noticed the difference) approached me and said "have you had a nose job". This girl was a friend of one of my friends and I knew instantly that my friend had told her about it. After that, I started to feel like people were talking behind my back etc. So this time with the BA, I did not tell anyone. I knew that my mum wouldn't really approve, especially as this was my 2nd cosmetic procedure. I did everything on my own. I went to the consultations and had the procedure on Tuesday without telling a soul. As I had mine under the muscle, I knew that I probably wouldn't be able to hide it from my parents so I told them when I came home in the evening. They were ok with it but I am glad I did not tell them beforehand as they would have tried to talk me out of it. The only thing my mum was upset about was if something would have happened to me under GA. Now, only my mum, dad and brother know and I don't intend to tell anyone else . My BA was only 230cc so very subtle difference and don't expect anyone to really notice a huge change xxx

Hello Newbie,
That is really upsetting that you felt you had to do it alone
Alot of people that are nasty tend to be unhappy themselves and are acting up as they are wanting to do something with their own lives.
If your surgeries made your self esteem better, then you hold your head high and be proud sweety. If your broke your leg it would have a cast put on, if you were depressed you would be prescribed meds. Low self esteem is poop and now you can be proud of your new additions x

Thanks very much for the lovely reply Olivia. The main reason I didn't tell anyone was really because of the fact that I am quite a private person and didn't really want my business being anyone's topic of conversation. I was quite open when I had my bump removed and found that in hindsight this was not the right way of dealing with things. I am proud of myself for having gone through the procedure on my own. I met a lovely girl at the hospital who shared my room and was glad that I had her with me to share our experience. It is not for everyone doing something so huge on their own, but I am quite a strong person and I have now proved to myself that I could do it. I haven't had a huge implant so can't see that anyone would notice. It sounds stupid but the surgery was more for myself and I was quite worried about going too big in case anyone did notice!! xxx

I told erveryone I knew but thats because everybody knew how much I hated my boobs. My sister came to all my appointments, and my husband came to the hospital on the day. Everyone was very supportive, but I wouldnt have cared less if they hadn't been. The only person who may have bothered me was if my husband didnt want me to do it. He is no fool though and the thought of big boobies outwayed any other problems we may have encountered!!!

Newbie..Your welcome and as long your happy xx
Phoebe..Im the same..told all. My best friend is taking me and my friends are all happy for me. Although alot didnt know how unhappy i am with them.
My husband is very supportive too, of course his wife having new fantastic puppies (hopefully) is a plus im sure!!

People are alwayds gonna have an opinion hunni, and many will try to drag you down. But at the end of the day its about you and what makes you happy, sod everyone else! My mum was really against it preop but obviously couldnt stop me, and post op, as soon as she saw my boobs she loved them too! She says the change in me as a person is phenomenal and shes now even considering some surgery herself, mainly a browlift. x