Bf doesn't really want me to have a BA - Advice?

Hi girls, I was hoping for a bit of advice please. My bf is great, he's supportive of everything I do and is behind me with my decision for a BA, however, he has mentioned more than once that he really doesn't think I need it and would prefer I didn't get it done. Have any of you girls experienced similar and what did you do? I want him to be on the same page as me but I think we're not quite there. 

Thanks! xx

Hi :) my boyfriend also did not like the fact I wanted one but also knew on the other hand how upset my breasts made me. He was with me every step of the way and is impressed with my end result as I didn't go huge and they look so natural. Hope this helps :) your doing it for you and no one wise Hun xxx

Hi Hun, my boyf has always been support because he knows how it makes me feel. I understand he may be worried about you but this is your body and your decision! You can tell him that you've done your research, you know it's a commitment but this is what you want and need his support rather than trying to talk you out of it. I've seen a few women here saying their OH didn't want it done but after they absolutely love the results lol! It may be he's feeling a bit insecure?
I think we all have a BA to improve our confidence and you need to live your own life for you and make your mind up. A happier you equals a happier life together with your boyf :) you never know what's going to happen in the future so you need to do it if its what you want because if not you may really regret it... He will be very happy when you've actually had your BA lol xx

Thank you! Definitely helps. I think maybe he doesn't want me to get one because I'm not massively depressed by them, I think they're ok but I have always always wanted bigger and fuller boobs to give me a figure as I have small hips and don't have much of a waist either. On and off I've contemplated doing it for years but didn't have the money. I can now afford them at last so I want to do it whilst I can enjoy them as I'm 27 now and maybe will want kids in my 30's. It's completely for me and no-one else, I'm sure he knows that. 

When did you have your surgery? Quite recently? How are you recovering? xx

Hey LB. My hubby was initially against the idea - "I love you as you are" - But he had to realise I wasnt doing this for him, or anyone else other than myself. We talked it out, and got to the bottom of it, which actually was more just his fear that I was putting myself in a surgical situation voluntarily. Once I had shown him all the research, and he'd come on the consultations with me, it really helped to put his mind at ease.

Hi Jennifer, you're right. I need to remind him that it will hopefully improve my confidence and make me feel good and in turn probably improve our relationship as I'll be happier. I think he's a huge worrier, he's scared something will go wrong during the op. And he is also perhaps a little insecure and because he sees me as perfect questions why I'd want this op. He knows deep down it's not that I want attention or anything like that as I'm going to stick with something appropriate for my frame. he's been to all my initial consultations too which is important and he's liked the majority of the surgeons too and he has his own favourite surgeon so far! ha. xx

Hi huni x my bf didn't want me to have one either. He kept saying I love you as you are! Which was lovely, only I didn't love me! He wouldn't really talk to me about it. But it was my body, me decision. And I can tell you that he's so pleased I didn't listen to him lol! He loves my new boobs, and he loves the change in me since having them xx

Try and talk to him, he's probably scared and worried about you, and maybe a little jealous of any attention you might get from others when you've had it done hun x men work in very strange ways! X

Hey hun,

My boyfriend was completely against me having a BA. We argued over it quite a lot to begin with but once i got out my reasons he gradually became more accepting of it. I know he will never be delighted that I had it done, but he understands my reasons. :) during recovery he was brilliant! I think its just natural for them to worry xxx

From all of the similar conversations I've seen on here it's definitely us who have to reassure the other halfs even though we're having the BA lol! Like the other girls suggest tell him why it bothers you and why your having it done and that your not changing your mind ... ;) so you want his support :) xx

Hehe! Thanks all! Seems like it's very normal for the bf's to worry then! I think he's just fed up with all the different consultations and some of the stress they're causing me too as it's all that I have on my brain right now. I think it's normal though as when you're in a state of confusion and unable to make a decision it affects everything. I'm hoping as soon as I find "the one" that my bf will also feel much better as it won't be a stressful thing anymore, I'll be excited instead and will be in a good mood as I'll have finally made my decision. We haven't really argued which is good :) xx

Aww do keep us all updated x who have you seen so far??

Hi Lisa. I've seen Charles Nduka, Paul Banwell and Baljit Dheansa - they're all with Spire and it's that order that I like them and that the bf likes them too. I am seeing Simon Withey of Mybreast on Thursday and Marc Pacifico in 2 weeks. All of these are the result of much research so I'm really hoping that I'll be in a position to make a decision. I have booked a date in October with Nduka as he's who I'm leaning to right now. xx

I'm similar to all the other girls. My bf is completely against the idea. Says I'm fine how I am and I'm ruining myself. But as time goes on I think he is getting used to the idea and will hopefully realise I'm not doing it for him or anyone else. But for me! I'm hoping once they are done he will love them. Surely he wouldn't be normal if he doesn't?? Haha. Fingers crossed. He loves me and will support me even if he doesn't agree xx

Your boyfriend isn't the one unhappy with their boobs babe, your boyfriend isn't the one who wakes up everyday and dresses with hopes that one day you can improve how you look.

This is YOUR body LB. This is YOUR choice.

Yes... It seems pretty standard for those that love us to 'love us just the way we are' I too went through the same with my husband.

I'm sure as I've found with ALL partners after surgery he will love them just as much as you do because although they may be augmented, they're still YOUR boobs. They're still a part if YOU. Nothing will change except for the size of your breasts and I'm sure after having time to digest all the information he may not agree... But he will understand.

This was the case for my husband anyway. He's very anti-cosmetic surgery and with my parents begged me not to go ahead with it. After talking through how 'I' felt and asking him to set aside his feelings he said he understood how i felt, but still didn't understand my need for surgery, however he said he'd support my decision because he respected that it was my choice to make.

Since having my BA, nothing has changed. He still loves me 'just the way I am' and wouldn't change a thing.

As long as YOU'RE comfortable and confident with your decision LB, your boyfriend will support you. Xxx

Your body your rules anything can happen in the future, im not saying you will split up but you need to do this for yourself if its what you really want x

I'm just going to echo what the others have said here really!

The closer I have got to my BA the more OH says that he doesn't like it, but also says he understands that it does affect me and that I have wanted it for a very long time and he will support me.

I think he's nervous as any operation comes with risks and this will be out of his control which is fair enough. 

You are making sure that you are getting as much info as possible by seeing different surgeons so it's obviously something that you are serious about doing and are taking seriously.

I would say that it is your body and only you know exactly how you feel so make sure that whatever you do, do it for YOU. No regrets.

Thanks girls! It makes me feel better that it's normal for OH's to be overly concerned and protective. My decision is made it's just a case of finding the right surgeon. I'm sure he'll be happy once I have fabulous boobs and feel confident with my body :) thanks again, you've all been so helpful! xx:Ok:

My hubby wasn't happy, to quote him it made him "feel sick". I told him i'm getting it done with or without him and that i told him ever since i was 14 and we first started dating that i was going to get it done. He was always against it but he started to support me as the op got nearer and he knew how serious i was. Now he is absolutely thrilled and loves them more than i do =P he is certainly getting my money's worth   x