BA in 8 days and I might have to cancel?!!

Hi Ladies, I haven't posted for a little while as I've been on my hols in Ibiza!! Anyway, my BA is booked for 15th July and I have split up with my partner - I'm not lookin for sympathy or anythin like that but he paid £1300 towards and is now sayin that he wants his money back. I haven't looked in my booklet but I'm pretty sure that this late I'll lose most of my money?

I could probably still go ahead and get a loan for his money but then what do I do about childcare for the kids! Such an awkward time for this to happen but to be honest it's probably for the best. I won't go into the borin details but I just don't know what to do? Should I just cancel and will I lose all or most of my money? His family were also helpin out over the weekend after my op so it's a bit awkward really. Aarrrgh bloody men!

xxx

Ahhh no! :( Hun is there not anybody friend of family that will help u pay him?
Can he not jus have it but by bit or is he being a **naughty word**?????

Don't cancel Hun! There's gotta b a Way round it xx

oh dear, I think if you cancel this late then you will lose quite a bit of the money paid. Might be worth checking though. Also if you do go ahead could maybe your partner take care of the kids and some friends help you out at home?

No there's nobody who could give me that kind of money, unfortunately!! He certainly doesn't need it and won't miss it but he's just bein an a*se isn't he like a typical man. But it's not just the money, it's childcare 2. We have 2 young kids and live together, he was takin a week off work to look after them but he's gone to stay at his mam's!! I don't wana not cancel and then have arguments with him after my op when I need to rely on him. Oh why do these things have 2 happen :o( it seems stupid 2 cancel now when I won't get any or very little of my money back but I just don't wana rely on him either! I don't really want him around the house when things are so tense between us, there isn't anywhere else I could stay either. I'll have to look into it 2moro and c wat they say xx

They're still his bloody kids! He has to look after them! Do not cancel, have your op! You deserve it!

Hope it works out for you hun!! XXx

He just dont want you having nice tits with other men!

Don't cancel. Have your op.

Agree a monthly payment until it is paid back. He never wrote a contract when he gave you the money saying it had to be returned on demand so he can bloody well wait for it.

Im a b1tch and would have the op and not pay him back, its not like he has a leg to stand on legally wise.. Also If you have been together a long time and live together you classesd as common law and Im pretty sure any money he has you are entitled to half (not 100% on that but your entitled to somthing), The other way I would look at it would be you gave him 2 beautifull children which took its toll on your body its the least you deserve lol...... As I said tho Im a b!tch when it come to things like that so prob not the right thing to do.... He should def have the children they are half his responsibility as well !! x

ooo hunni dont cancel just tell him you have already paid for the ba and he must wait! and send the kids to his mam, im shure they are going to take good care of them!
haw old are they?

Dont cancel! You deserve this and you've probably been waiting for such a long time !
He has no legal tie with that money in the eyes of the law it is a personal gift so even then you dont have to give it back unless you are extremely kind (and a better person than me!)
Dont let him take this away from you.
All us girls are here to support you babe xx

you poor thing! if i was you i would go ahead. im sure you would rather be in debt part of the money to your partner than loose all that money and come out the other end with nothing! Its not like he can force you to give money you dont have! either that or make up with him for a cpl weeks??? (wooppss thats my bad side coming out lol) hope you get it sorted! xx

[quote="springstep123"]He just dont want you having nice tits with other men!

Hahaha thats exactly what i thought!!

He's said that he won't waste his holidays from work 2 do me a favour - he will use them in his own time 2 take the kids sumwhere! He's told me 2 ask my own family & not 2 ask his 4 help but he knows there's no chance that mine cud, neither my mam or dad av transport & my mams not a well person! I told him this and now he's said that i shud stay at my mams 4 a wk coz he wasnt sleepin in the same bed as me. Again, def not an option! She doesn't av the space, my 16yr old sister is a total brat & my mam & her partner are constantly arguin. Not sumwhere nice 2 go after an op.

Blood men!!! Aaargh! I don't think its the money he's really bothered about he's just tryin 2 b spiteful & 2 b honest it's very unlikely i'd give him it back! xx

lauraswts wrote:you poor thing! if i was you i would go ahead. im sure you would rather be in debt part of the money to your partner than loose all that money and come out the other end with nothing! Its not like he can force you to give money you dont have! either that or make up with him for a cpl weeks??? (wooppss thats my bad side coming out lol) hope you get it sorted! xx

Haha we havent been gettin on 4 ages but i've tried 2 wait until after the op, unfortunately it didnt happen!!! xx

Id deffo still go ahead,

I'd rather be out of pocket and have a new pair of boobs than be out of pocket and boobless!!

Let the ex play games, the more he does things to spite you the more you'll realise your better off without him!! He's saying these things so you dont go ahead with your op at the end of the day, dont let him win!!

x

I just want to echo wat all the girls are saying. I spilt with my long term partner b4 my op. Def get him to have kids, because they are his as well!!!! And def don't cancel. Tell him he's money stuck and the only way is to wait for his money from u.

Focus on yr boob job and try not to let this get u down. Can u book into a cheap b and b for a week?

Hope things work out for u. Remember def don't cancel! Stand yr ground. Tell him it's severance pay!

Did you find out where you stand as regards the op hon? Would you get your money back? If not, I would totally go ahead - no point in seeing that money go down the pan. They are his children too so he is equally responsible and should help you sort something. Really hope it works out and you get your boobs x

i think this is really mean of him!!! tell him its non refundable, and u will pay him back gradually when u can. its tough!!!! youve already paid and cant get the money back, just say that!!! xx

omg what a typical man they can be so selfish ,i hope all works out for you ............dont cancel x

Aww hun, how awful. Have to say I totally agree with the girls, DO NOT CANCEL, I'm sure you'll find someway round the childcare. Good luck hunni. xx

tell him you have to go to (where ever the op is) to retrieve back his money and whilst you are there getting back his money he will have to look after the kids for you,

at least that way you can go for your operation get your new boobies and when he calls you to ask when your picking the kids up just tell him your really ill and he will have to keep them for a few days till your better....sneaky but it mite work lol.

i do feel for you as im in a similar situation i have 2 x small kids and im on my own fortunatly i have been getting on with my ex over the last few months and he is going to help with the kids.

your partner has a right to help you out after all they are his kids too hun.

he obviously doesnt want you to have the op....so to me it would be a case of two fingers up at him and go get it done, do you not have a bezzy mate that could help you out sweets x

Thanks for all ur kind words!! We've been together 7 years and our kids r 3 and 18 months so it's sad that he's bein like this.

I looked in the transform booklet and if I cancel within 7 days of the op I lose all the money.

It's just really the childcare that's the issue at the min, I was relyin on him and his family. I need 2 go into hospital on the Thursday night and gettin my op on Fri aft. The kids were stayin with his mam Thurs nite n she was takin my daughter school and his gran was takin my son until he got home from work on Fri aft and then they were goin to his mams again over the wkend once I got home but now he's sayin not 2 bother askin them! Plus he's stayin there also so there's no room!!! I haven't even told any of my friends really - only my family and the 1 girl I go the gym with so have no friends 2 help out.

I'll just av 2 c wat happens, i'm just tryin 2 b civil at the min as i'm sick of arguin with him. If we do av 2 spend the wk together i need it 2 b peaceful(ish) haha!

Thanks again ladies xxxx

Hi hun, please dont cancel, thats exactly what he wants!!
Men can be so imature at times... the best thing you could do is still get it done and wipe that smile off his face!
If you dont do it, you will regret it sooo much, i know its gonna be awkward now you have split and looking after kids ect, but hopefully you maybe lucky like me and have no pain, or even just a little and you may find you can manage fine on your own!!

Just think in 2 months time you will will be feeling fine and love your new boobs xxx

updates?????????xxxxx

I agree with the other girls hun don't cancel and lose all that money.

I can see that the childcare is the bigger issue here rather than the money he wants back. Why don't you contact his family, I know hes saying not to but they will problies love having their grankids for a while.

He really sounds like hes just being a difficult p***k to me hun and I wouldn't let him stand in the way of getting your dream boobs. x

Ur all rite there's def no point in cancellin - if i'd been able 2 get my money back I maybe would have just so i didnt av 2 ask him 4 help but not if i'm gona lose it all!! He came in earlier while I was on the fone 2 the hospital lookin 4 clothes 4 the kids, then when he left I txt him sayin 'That was the hospital on the fone for Thur, need 2 sort sumet 4 the kids. I've waited long enough 4 this & i'm not wastin my money'. He hasn't replied!! So pathetic, he'l b worried that im gona look and find sum1 better haha!!

I'm just gona leave it over the wkend and see if I hear anythin from his family and if not i'll ask myself. I'm not gona beg 4 help i'll just av 2 tell him we need 2 sort childcare cos i'm goin ahead with it! Pr*ck! xx

I agree w jenn86.. tell him theres no refunds for the OP.. guys can be such dirt bags..sorry your havin all this drama so close to what should be an exciting time!