Any advice on whether to tell the kids?

Hi
I have a 9 year old son and I am wondering whether to tell him or not before I do it? Has anyone else had older kids that can advise.
Thanks

Hi Shaydey,
My boys are a little bit older than yours, but yes I did tell them. Partially because I need their help and support for a few weeks post op, but also because I figure if I am open with them about things then they will be open with me.

At the end of the day, your his mum and I am sure you want the best for him, so any decision you make will be the right one


Best of luck x

mine were 2, 3 and 9 when i had mine done, and i didnt tell any of them and none of them noticed.

I told mine, they were 7, 9 and 12. ( the baby was one and a half so was not aware!)
I did this so they wouldn't worry - why did I have an op, why wasn't I driving, why was I taking painkillers and sometimes sleeping in the day.

I think mine would have worried that something was wrong with my health as we have a close family friend who is very ill and they are very empathetic to her children.
They all thought it was quite amusing really and they had a great day out in Plymouth at the Aquarium to boot PLUS two meals at the Premier Inn which they still talk about!

It all depends on how your son is really, on how you think he will interpret your recovery i.e. will he turn it into something awful in his head or will he really not notice?

Good Luck xx

i had a 4, 2 and 1 yr old when i got mine and i told them. Well i told my olderst two. My daughters are now 5 and 3. I am so glad i told them as they new they had to be careful with me after the op. My oldest daughter asked why i was getting them done and i explained to her. We are very open and honest in our house so i would never keep anything like that from them xx

Hiya chick,

I have a 9 yr old and 18 mth old and I told my 9 yr old so I could have her support rather than her moaning at me wanting me to drive her here and there!! Plus she is actually helping round the house which is a bonus.

Good luck x x x

Mine are 7 and 5 and I told them I was having an op, but not what for (I think theyre too young to understand body issues etc). They were with their dad for 10 days over Xmas while I recovered, so I was much fitter to look after them when they came back.

My daughter is 5. I told her I was working to explain being away overnight then told her I had a sore chest so she had to be careful. She's never noticed.

I told my 9yr old daughter. My other two are 6months old girl and a boy who is two on tuesday. I told my eldest as she is becoming very body concious already and would notice me not being here. I would rather be upfront so as to notworry her. She also knows she can ask any questions she wants. I have quite an open policy with her.
Only you can judge whats best for your kids though xx

I have a 9 and 6 year old boys, they know I'm having an op but not what for, if they notice I will explain to them but if they don't I won't. I don't think they would understand why I was having it done, my eldest has ADHD and ASPERGERS so my situation may be different. I think everyone is right it's personal choice xxxxxx

My kids were all older than yours 12, 15, 16 yr old boys and 12 & 17 yr old girls. They all knew I hated my boobs, and we are very open, never entered my head not to tell them, but everyone is different xx

I have 13yr old boy & 6yr old girl. My hubby & I disucssed this a lot before hand. We didn't tell them before I went in that I was going to have an op as we thought they would worry at school & hubby told them that afternoon that I had had an op to get my shape back. When I got home I said I was very sore & had to rest alot. My daughter was interested in the top of the strapping she could see. She has since seen me in the shower with the waterproof dressings on which she was interested in but she didn't seem to notice my boobs were lots bigger!! We also said that this was a very private thing and that we weren't going to be discussing this wiht anyone outside our immediate family & that they shouldn't either. They seem to have completely got that & it hasn't been as much an issue as I thought it would be.

My kids are nearly 10, nearly 9, nearly 5, 3 and 2. I've told the oldest 2 that I will be getting them done but dont know when yet. But the younger 3 have no idea and dont need to know imo either xx

hi

I posted this exact same question mine are 9 (boy) and 6 (girl). My son is a bit of a worrier and any mention of hospitals i knew i would get a hundred and one questions. Cookie came up with a good one which i did use. We dont lie but as she said a little white one like this ( we all do santa and thats quite a big one) wont hurt. I said i had a works do and stayed at my freinds because she lives nearer to work. Then when i was home when they came home from school i said i had a chest infection so had to have a week off work and they mustn`t jump on me because it was sore. There were no questions just oops sorry mum i nearly forgot and nearly jumped on you!. I came to them for hugs carefully. They have not noticed a thing 8 weeks on. There were a few reasons i decided not to say 1 because of the worry 2 i dont want my daughter to even think about body issues exist and it also saves the whispering in the play ground from the dad`s lol and mums of course. I can just hear my 6 year old now exclaiming to all my mummy`s had a boobie op ! i`d die.
Anyway each to their own it`s up to you but it can be done, i`m sure i will tell them if the subject comes up when they are old enough but i decided not at this age. Good luck hunxxx

Hi hun,

One of the most hardest things to deal with when it came to my b.A was the children.

I have 1 ten year old boy, 1 ten year old girl, 1 six year old boy & 1 two year old girl.

I didnt want to tell them about the actual breast Aug i was having done as one I didnt want my negative views of my own body image to rub off or influence my older daugher at her tender age but i didnt want to lie to any of them about me having a 'op' god forbit anything happend & they were not aware of what i was doing would just be horrible...............So I told them i was having a tummy op( which i did have the same year for a hernia) & that id be very fragile for a few weeks.

They coped fine with it & I told them the basics of what was involved in a genral op e.g the G.A ect & they felt fine ith it as they understood to a certant exstent what was going on.

They have noticed my boobs have grown but in passing comments as at there age they id like to think they have no idea what a B.A is! lol

When i feel the time is right, they are old enough to understand then ill sit them down & exsplain the reasons why i had it done.

x

My son is 5 and i told him . he didnt want me to at first because wed just spent 4 weeks in hospital with his opertion .. when i said mummy wanted big boobies he said do i need a op i said yes.. he cried and i felt bad but i explained they only operate to make things better ..
When i had them done before i came home i called him and he asked me if id been for a pee, ate my sandwich and had rest i said yes and he was happy .. when i got back He said WOW mummy you got big boobies they look great i love big boobies... and he hasnt stopped lol xx

Thanks for your feedback everyone. I definitely think that having a 9 year old son and a 9 year old daughter is different cause i know that i would tell my daughter in a flash. Whereas my son is already obsessed with woman and their boobs and not sure I want him telling all his friends in the playground. LOL. Will see how it goes. Havent even told my mum yet.

hi, i didnt tell many either, my o/h was with me for the whole process but my mum only became aware just before the op when i asked her to have my daughter over night. my daughter is 9 on tuesday and although i didnt tell her why i was away when i left her my mum explained to her that i was finally have an op on my boobs (they day of our return home). we are a very open family and my daughter was fully aware of my wishes to have a BA. the reason i didnt want her to know just before i left was i didnt want her worring, however she was aware i was delicate on return. quite ofter she asks what did they do, or how do the feel? she even asked if she could touch them (i think to see if they really felt normal / and not plastic!!) . . unfortunatly she is now asking 'when are you going to stop talking about your boobs!' she understood that this is a family issue and not to return to school and tell the class/ or ask me in for a show n tell!
it is a very personal view on telling our children, think about how they would feel, would your son really understand? lets be honest boys being boys, would he really care mum's doing something to her boobs (ment in a nice way!).
but remeber you will be feeling a little tender after and the last thing you will want is your son to come running in and jump up at you, i'm still cautions of cuddling my daughter and at 5wk post op, although she and i have worked out the back cuddle or the under the boob cuddle.

go with your heart on this one kids are great and just getting on with life, and enjoy the experiance x

Thanks Narn. Really nice to hear other peoples stories. You are pretty similar to me in pre-size and implant size. How are you feeling at 5 weeks? Do you love them?

I LOVE THEM ...
cant wait to be meassure to find out exactly what i am but hoping my calculation are about there.
the best thing is they look right, i didnt want to be chesty morgan, and sick to death of having nothing now i can by clothes and more to the point underwear sets xx

That is exactly what I want. Dont want big boobs, just some boobs. Cannot wait to be able to buy a bikini and fill it for the first time in my life.

really wish you the best and please dont panic about telling people/ mother/ son, sometime we have to be selfish and do things for ourselfs. think of the bikin in the summer !!

My main reasons for not telling my 5 year old were:

1. She has a lot of experience of an elderly relative being in hospital and this was mostly a negative experience for her so I didn't want her to worry, as kids do.
2. I didn't want my negative body image to rub off on her, particularly at the age she is.
3. I didn't want her telling all and sundry in the playground

I will tell her when she's old enough to understand.

I think it depends on the age of kids, how they would react to the news, etc. Only you know your kids well enough to know if they can handle the info just now or if it's best to wait.