My Mum

has just got all teary and begged me not to have my BA next week.


She asked me just to wait until next year- and think about why I am doing it and who I am doing it for.

She was really upset- she didn't even seem a bit angry which I was expecting and it's upset me now too.

She said she wont be disappointed in me if I do it but she'll me worried that I will regret it and be hurt..

I don't know how to put her mind at rest and until her mind is a rest mine wont be!

aw hun

are you able to discuss it properly with her, find out her reasons for not wanting you to have it done?

our parents always love us just the way we are, x

My mum did the same to me right before my op too hun, I think its quite selfish to be honest. I told her I'm not waiting because there's no point really as I knew i would still want a BA 6 months or 6 years from now! You wont regret it x

aw Jade as mum23boys says 'mums love us the way we are' ..... she's just worried about you.

Sit down with her and talk it through, I'm sure everything will be okay.

xxx

My Mum was the same although a bit ruder IMHO. She is fine now though. Think they just worry about us.
You wouldn't do this to make some one else happy, so the same applies, you don't NOT do it to appease someone else either.

SW x

Aww hun - I think they just worry about us so much.

My mum was dead against me having a boob job and felt I might regret it too. But the very day I called her after having it done and she could hear the sheer joy and excitement in my voice she completely changed her mind. Now she says she has to admit it has changed me as a person for the better only in that I have so much more confidence now.

I'm really sure this will be the same for your mum, she's just worried for you. I agree with SnowWight - you have to do what makes you happy and I'm 100% sure she'll come round when she sees how happy you are afterwards.

Jess xx

Aw Jade xx

This has clearly made you think and uneasy, also important to you. You say your mum has acted different from you expected, not angry etc. I think we often have an image of how mum's should react, which is often very different from what we think. They are just women same as you, and an adult mum and daughter relationship is or should alter to friendship as well as just being my mum and daughter.

Sounds to me like Mum loves and cares for you very much indeed and perhaps has sound reasons for feeling as she does, only you would know if that is right and reasonable. She is not asking you not to do it...just to think, and she sounds very supportive. I would think you would enjoy the experience with her on board and a move to a deeper and changed level in your relationship.

I guess I am looking at this as a Mum of a 24year old beautifull, caring daughter and friend. We are always there for each other and she said to me to reseach and ensure I am doing the right thing (knowing it was very visible I did) and supported me. Similar as your mum has to you She loves me to bits...but can get angry with me too....reversal of roles sometimes...she is the best! I just love her!!

I guesss what I am trying to say is: has your Mum got good reason to pose this to you? do you understand them? agree? etc.

Sorry if this is not what you want to hear or feels harsh, but, I guess I would like to think YOU were SURE before you make a decision and having your Mum's support will help emotionally as well as on a practical level.

If you believe she is being unfair, I dont think you would need to doubt yourself.

Thinking of you Jade, hope you can think it through and discuss with Mum...whatever your decision xxxxxx

Aw jade completely understand why you cant settle with her being like this but like the others have said you have to do what will make you happy and im sure when she sees how pleased you are she will be glad for you too.

x x x

My mum cried and begged me not to do it. I had to sit her down and explain it to her so many times, in the end I just got my bras out to show her and put them next to one of hers. I cried, we both cried and she supported me in the end, but it wasn't easy. She was just so scared for me, as any mum would be I suppose.

I had a similar reaction from my mum, I think its just normal for them to worry over the thought of an operation that their child is having that is not necessary and can have risks.

What I did was reassured her somewhat that a lot of women have it done and that I myself felt that after such a long time having a complex over it, I needed it done to boost my self esteem again.

I had taken her advice before and given it some time but I felt that this time round I was ready for it regardless of what anyone said xx

Thank you for all your support girls

Mia, I know why she feels the way she does but I am happy that I am doing this for me and I don't want to wait any longer.

I think I am going to sit down with her this weekend and explain everything to her and hopefully she'll come round

aww my mum didnt mind i told her i was gonna do it she didnt belive me i returned with my recipt and told her i booked it, she was shocked but didnt think id go threw with it. i then had them done when she was away in wales and when she returned i had big boobs lol hope ur mums round

Aw Jade, it sounds like a really normal mum reaction, she's just worried about her little girl having surgery. I think we come on here every day and we're so armed with all the facts and it's all we think about that it becomes less of an ordeal but for someone on the outside who cares for you it's still a massive thing with loads of taboo's and misconceptions.

The last thing I read is when she babysat for you and you thought she'd seen something on the laptop, what have I missed?? x

my mum was the same but once she could see I was going to have it done no matter what she or anyone else said then she let up abit. I think it was party because I wanted big boobs and she thought I'd end up like katie price. lol. but she thinks there ok now I've had them done. remember hun your doing it for yourself and thats all that matters! xx

angelslice wrote:
The last thing I read is when she babysat for you and you thought she'd seen something on the laptop, what have I missed?? x

I asked her about this and she hadn't seen anything so I was worried about nothing

Aww Jade. I think our parents generation just see the extremes of cosmetic surgery especially breast augmentation. Your mum probably has pictures of Jordon in her head and has read all the nasty horror stories that are in the press. If you explain to her how much research you've done and how natural they can look (you're welcome to show her my pics if you want!) maybe she'll come around. She's probably just worried about her "little girl" going under the knife (just as you would be if it were Evie).

AW hun!

To be honest i thik its a total mum caring about her daughter & being worried about you! ITs a natural feeling for a mother to want to protect her daughter............Im a mother off 4 perfect little kiddies & the protectioon over them i feel is just uncontrolable! if i had my daughter come to me wanting a boob job id be worried sick about her! like she said if you want to do it then you can but she is just worried about her little girl,
My mum was very supportive & didnt show me her fears even though i new she was worried about it........she then spent two days after crying with releaf that i was ok after my op!
God i get upset if my kids have to have there jabs!
Its just hard for a mother to see there child go through something like this..........................she will be fine & so will you X

Aww hun big hugs , I can totally relate to how your feeling, my mum too was exactly the same. I tried and tried to speak to her about it but she couldnt understand why I wanted to go through with it. I think it's because they still see us as their 'perfect little girls' in their eyes. You know your reasons for doing it hun and Im sure after your op, your mum will see how happy you are for going through with it. I know its tough seeing your mum like this hun but try and sit down and talk to her again and explain your reasons for doing this. When she understands how much this means to you it will be easier. My mum realised like Jessica's how happy I was and how it changed me, I am so much more confident now and a lot happier as I feel so much more in proportion. Good luck huni and let us know how you get on xxxx