what to tell a 9 year old

by Happy1day 7th May 2013, 11:58 am

Hi everyone, I hope somebody can help me! I am due for surgery on the 25th May and my older son (13 years old) knows what I am having done, and isn't really bothered either way! my younger son (9) is a real worrier and I definitely don't want him to know. My hubby is going to drop me off for the surgery and then take him as planned to football training, but I don't know where to say I am going, and if I lie, what to say to him afterwards! Maybe I am over thinking things and he won't be bothered, but I don't want him to think I have lied to him, but at the same time, I don't think he needs to be worrying unnecessarily. Anyway I am worried enough without having to convince him that everything is fine!!! Sorry to ramble on ... x

by **COOKIE** 7th May 2013, 12:08 pm

Little white lies for the good of a person never hurt anyone babe... Especially a child who is so young.

You could say you're staying with a friend and when you come home you may be hunched and a little fragile just explain that you've hurt your back but you're OK and he has nothing to worry about.

It'll be fine lovely. He'll be none the wiser. Your fragile state will explain the back problem and he will be able to 'see' that you're OK and will probably be happy to help his mum until she's feeling better.

Hope all goes well babe. Xx

by loclo26 7th May 2013, 1:12 pm

He probably won't notice. My 6 year old daughter only noticed the bandages, I told her I had a little op on my ribs and she's never said a word since. Ill tell her when she's older but for now she don't care one bit lol x

by Lisa34 7th May 2013, 1:15 pm

I agree with cookie, a few white lies won't hurt x pretend to be going out with a friend Hun x he won't know any different if his life isn't disrupted x I told my lot 17,16,14,13,11,7 but I just had to say boobies ouchy to the 2 year old lol x

by RayRayT 7th May 2013, 3:19 pm

Glad you asked this, I've been wondering the same. My boys are 9 and 5 and can be very inquisitive! I'm usually really truthful but I don't feel the need to explain the whole ins and outs of it! My hubby said to not say anything just say I'm poorly! x

by angie8131 7th May 2013, 4:09 pm

Hi Happy1day, I was in the same situation a little while ago. I decided not to tell them at first and play it by ear. But when I came home my eldest (12yr old girl) saw an ice bag on my chest so I told her I had them fixed as breastfeeding wore them out, (I couldn't have lied to her as she notices everything!!). I told her that she's a big girl and I trust her not to tell anyone, which was my biggest concern. To my 7 year old boy I told I hurt my ribs in the gym. Bless he was so worried, he wouldn't leave the house in case I need him. He'd stand by the door with me telling him to go out but him saying that he can't leave what to tell a 9 year old 571992

. He was fine by the next day. Good luck, but we always overthink things, you'll be surprised how simple it is when the time comes to tell them xx

by 5stonedown 7th May 2013, 6:26 pm

I told my 7 year old and she was fine with it but I have always been 100% honest with her and she responds best to this approach. Every child is different so you need to do what is right for your own child.

by Happy1day 7th May 2013, 8:43 pm

Thanks for all your replies - I'm so scared myself and I am saying to my older son its no big deal I'll be fine!!! Xx

by RayRayT 7th May 2013, 9:17 pm

I think I may nick the breastfeeding blame explanation, lol. :ok:

I dont know about you Happy but I think my boys may figure something else is going on. xx

by angie8131 7th May 2013, 9:24 pm

:flowers:

by Mrs_B_24 7th May 2013, 10:08 pm

Good luck with what ever you decide to do. I'll be in a similar situation next year, not with children as I don't have any but with my family, only my sisters and husband will know so tying to keep it quiet and to isolate myself for a weekish is going to be hard, not looking forward to that bit. Xx

by tinkerbell24 8th May 2013, 9:35 am

i decided not to tell my daughter who is 8 as if she is happy with her body when shes older with what ever she has then fab!!

i told her i was going in for an op under my arm so she knew i was going to stay in hospital and that i would be sore for a few weeksxx

by Ballet babe 8th May 2013, 10:01 pm

Hi I had a few lines rehearesed for my 8 yr old girl, but she was overnight at a friends during my overnight in hospital so that didnt really register, then my husband and I just said I had a sore back and she accepted that without question. Altho she was wondering yester why i am always wearing the same pink sports bra! I do wonder what she will think when I don a bikini top in the summer but for now its really no different a look than my padded bras. My little boys were just concerned Mummy wasnt well and wanted to look after me, and even my 2 yr old keeps saying now "you cant lift me" and walks rather than gets carried eg up the stairs to bed. The baby will never know any different! As someone said before, its easier than u think or I certainly found this to be true, and she might not notice anyway. GL x

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what to tell a 9 year old

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