Need reassurance :'(

Hi ladies, I need some help to stop obsessing over my gappy / lack of cleavage!

I have just had another good cry looking at pics online of women with great boobs! Why am I doing that?! I'm mental! It just makes me sad! I know I am still early on but I am so scared as I had gappy boobs before I just gonna have the same again but bigger... and still no cleavage! And still so hard feels like they are getting no-where with the softening up.

I have started obsessing about it and dunno what to do. I thought having a BA would make me happy, and so far, it hasn't Just so upset right now, sorry to moan xxx

PS ignore my avi, it's cheating! Side shot with epic padded bra on, total cheat :(

You sound like me earlier this week! I have been obsessing about the tenting that I still get when I wear a wired bra and worried that they are still very hard etc. We are at a similar stage healing wise and I think we probably think we should be healed by now so we get worried about things but as the wise Cookie told me we are still early on in our healing and things still have to change. I bet as they soften you will get a good cleavage and hopefully will I. (My avi is a cheat too cos I am seriously pushing them together!)

I think if your boobs already look that good (even though you're wearing a padded bra), and you're only 2 months in, I think you'll be really happy once they drop and fluff more. I know I'd be totally paranoid about it too, and its hard not to obsess, but from what I hear its completely normal! Just try and think positively and keep venting it out on here as just talking about it helps in itself.

I'm sure they will change and soften as time goes on. I also think you need to be realistic about the natural breast shape you had before and that a BA doesn't necessarily change that. If you had a reasonable gap before you will still have it afterwards. I'm someone with quite a gap between my boobs and I've been told not to expect much different after my BA. Hope you feel happier with them soon.

I'm no expert but I read loads and loads caus I thought I would have to have unders. It can take months to fluff drop and settle and your avi already looks gorgeous they will look great I'm sure of it x x x x

Hey I'm a year po today, Whoo hoo. Anyways like you two I used to obsess that after all the pain I went through I have ended up with boobs that have no cleavage and just look totally fake, that was at 3-4 months, at 6 - months they had settled a little more and when I wore a bra I had the beginnings of a cleavage in a bra, not what I wanted bit it was better than before. However now my boobs look great with a bra on, my clevage has improved 10 fold and I am much happier.

So babe please try not to stress to much, your boobs will settle and go through so so so many changes over the next year.

I totally understand how you're feeling I went through the exact same thing feeling depressed and amost Hating my boobs as they were not how I wanted them to be immediately.

But honestly they will become softer and settle so much over the coming months, I bet in a years time you will be bjs, telling someone who has just had a bj not to worry about how their clevage looks at 2 months po. ;)

Your avi looks amazing, I really hope you are able to stop feeling down about your boobs. Xxxx

One of the golden rules in healing sweetheart is not to compare your healing to others lovely

Although 2 months may seem seem like a decade to you in terms of healing, in reality you're only just off the starting line babe. For some ladies softening will start early, but for others it takes much longer! I was 6 months post-op before my boobs made a difference! So you see, your upset is very premature babe, you honestly do still have many changes ahead.

It's only when your boobs do soften up lots that they gain that movement to create great cleavage hun, so, the point you're at right now, is absolutely right for the point of healing you're at.

Oh and if you're a cheat in you're avvy, then every single one of us wearing a wired bra in our avvy is a cheat too, because none of us would look the way we do in our avvys without the help of a cheeky little bra :thumbs: xxxx

Hi zebra

Cheer up hunni I'm sure you boobs will do a lot of changes yet, they look fab on your picturetrail !! I understand the boob greed though as have a little myself lol.
My right boob has always been softer than my left and still is so I'm guessing our boobs will change a lot over the coming months, please don't feel sad ((((BIG HUGS)))) from me xxx

Well I'm in my sexy gown and stockings! Lol, waiting to go down, THIS IS IT

Zebra hun I think you've had really good advice. Especially like nona's post - the patience part is the worst part of all this. If your boobies are still firm then you've still some way to go before they jiggle & are able to make a beautiful cleavage with them. People who have seen your picture trail have said how good they are looking (me for one). I think when we look at our selves especially somewhere that we've always had big issues with - its gonna be so easy to pick fault in what we see. We can't picture what everyone else can & I think it takes time for that to settle too. Just keep those pre-op pics near by & when your having a moment remind yourself of them. Keep smiling & keep waiting lovely.

P.s (Im sure there will be plenty of posts from me in the weeks and months to come cause I hate waiting, hate suprises and I worry about everything being abnormal lol.)

Aww sorry your feeling upset bout your boobs hunny. As the other girls have said it takes ages up to a year for them to gain some 'natural' movement. I can relate more than anyone Hun as I had exactly the same cc as you first ba and unders and had a very gappy cleavage. Mine never actaully even come together even years later.
I have a very wide cleavage anyway and it's true that a ba will only give you a bigger version of what You already have. They will soften more I promise and you may be able to get a great cleavage with push up bras eventually, but I didn't like the way push ups made my boobs looked as it was pretty gappy so I stuck to balconetttes which push them up accentuating my boobs rather than pushing them together.

You will find brasand styles that work for you and your boobs babe x your more than welcome to look at my picture tail with my 380cc in and take a look at them to see what They looked like xx

Dont worry,i never had a cleavage before my ba ,and a year on when without a bra i still have a maybe 2 finger gap but if i wear a good push up padded bra i do get a bit of cleavage,there 100% better than i started out with!!!!xxxx

Zebra your boobs are great, I have seen your picture trail , and they really do look good . Dont like to read about you stressing You still have a long way to go ( as do I ! Hope my nipples even up! Wonky donkey)

5stone - Hope your tenting has gone down? Thanks though, we are still early days but it’s so frustraiting! Haha cheat or not, they look amazing! x
Alexandria18 – Thank you for the wise words, I will deffo keep venting on here....it helps so much :) x

Becca86 – Thanks :) Larger gappy boobs might have to do! x

Scatty247 – Aw thank you chick x

Nona79 – Aw that’s lovely to hear your journey to find the cleavage has been slow too! Thanks for the lovely reply, really made me smile! And yeah, hopefully one day I will be saying the as you have to me  As you know it’s just such a slow process that no-one actually warns you about! Xx

Cookie – So true, must stop comparing but it’s hard! Thanks for your always wise words Cookie :) It must do your head in ladies coming on here like me always moaning haha! Happy you’re always around to make us feel better though. PS true about the cheating avi thing haha x

Zoie25 – Aw thanks chick, how do you have boob greed?! Your boobs look amazing! We are just way to greedy haha x

Cazzyxo – Awwww thanks, really lovely words there chick :) Funnily enough I looked at my pre-op pic yesterday and couldn't stop smiling! Hhaha I am sure you will be on here to worrying just like me xx

MrsBall – Nice to hear you had the same issue, feel like I’m alone! Thanks for the advice with the balconette bras, will deffo give them a go when I can. I think I have your pic trail details on my inbox so thank you I will have a look at your 380cc pics! I want the boobies you have now, so amazing :) x

Sparklyleeds – Thank you, I have a two finger or more gap to! Happy with a good bra though you get a cleavage! My day WILL come, just not yet! Patience is the key I guess x
J
akki – haha wonky donkey, that made me smile! I bet your boobies look fab! Thanks though chick, you aren't that far behind me are you on the journey! Be nice when we finally get our end result  x

OMG epic reply...you ladies were lovely enough to help me out only fair I reply to you all! Thanks so much, would be lost without this place

Cookie – So true, must stop comparing but it’s hard! Thanks for your always wise words Cookie :) It must do your head in ladies coming on here like me always moaning haha! Happy you’re always around to make us feel better though. PS true about the cheating avi thing haha x

On the contrary zebra, I love this forum and everyone here and I don't think you're moaning at all. I think you're scared, worried and hopeful and we've all been there zebra, so passing my experience on in the hope it might help makes me happy hun xx

Oh Hun you're never alone weve all been through similar and the same things so you're never alone here xx

Awww bless ya Cookie, such a love :) xx

Yeah Mrsball, it's such a nice place to come...esp after a poo day at work or whatever, talking boobs takes your mind off everything else, lol xx

My tenting is still very much there whenever I put them in a bra...

Weird! When does it go?

Dunno but its horrid and it upsets me so much. Here is a pic taken looking down. You can see how much its raised that you cant see the top of the bra between my boobs!

Wow! Have you spoke to the nurse about it? Is it normal? I have never heard of it until the other day on here!

No I havent yet, got my 12 week appointment in 3 weeks so I was gonna wait till then. Its bad isnt it!!

Fingers crossed you get some good advice 5stonedown - youll have to keep us posted. Mine has gone down slightly, still there though. On my picture trail you can see the big yellow bruise where it is, I cant post it cause theyre nakey :P

Its weird cos out of a bra it goes completely?!

That is puzzling hun. Theres not much on it when you search it on here!