should I take someone with me 4 my BA?

Hello girls,
I have been reading so much about lady's getting the blues after there BA and just wondering if I should bring an old friend along with me even if she annoys me every now n then, I have 3 children and was wondering if I would appreciate the quietness of being alone for hrs.? would I be sleeping a lot and feel very tired ? the only thing is that I am a very shy person and IF needed assistance I wouldn't ring the bell unless I'am dying, what would you suggest?

If you feel it would be easier to have someone there with you then certinly take someone, Im taking hubby as like you im very shy so wouldnt ask if complete neccasary. If you think the quiet would be nice then do go by yourself you could maybe have someone there with you just before and after you b.a then she could leave.

Hi,
I have had this debate in my head.... I have 2 children... my surgery is on a sunday, and I am being picked up early... not had times etc yet, but I will prob need to be at Dolan park by 9am and I live 2and half hours away... if hubby comes/takes me, then stays in local hotel, it's 2 nights we need to sort the children out, then obviously after having the surgery I need to rely on mum, to help with the kids! So what I've decided is to go alone... then I'll be brought back on the Monday lunchtime.... I am quite looking forward to a bit of peace and quiet and rest, as I never get time to myself- I'm always rushing around!!! I know I will be nervous though... and the thought of the GA scares me!! But realistically... it makes more sense for my hubby to stay home with the kids, go to work on the Monday, then I'll be home!
If you feel that it'll make things easier for you, then take someone... but don't forget that the staff are there to help, because you paid them!!! It's a bit different to the NHS really.... and the staff see the same things day in day out, so should definately be approachable!!!
x

Totally don't be shy around the staff! It's what they're paid for!

In hospital, I had my friend and BF come and visit me, but they only stayed a couple of hours each, and then left me to rest, because I was knackered! Then my BF looked after me once I went home, but the extent of his "looking after" really just involved being in yelling distance for the 1st day, and on the 2nd day, he just left me propped up on the couch while he went motocross riding all day!!

To be honest, I didn't need any more help than that, because I spent most of those 2 days sleeping - I was just shattered the whole time! By day 3, I was much more human, and he took me out to breakfast, and entertained me a bit more...

I had overs though, which apparently leave you a lot more able-bodied than unders... so it might depend a little

I have debated the same question long and hard! I considered taking hubby with me but to be honest he's not very good with hospitals and would be useless seeing me in any kind of pain. He passed out when our kiddies were born and once even fainted in the hairdressers when he was accidentally nicked by a pair of sissors!!! I think i would probably end up looking after him!!! lol

I have decided to take a very good friend with me. I am going to drive there in the morning (to distract me!), she will stay over and then drive me home. Like you I will be looking forward to some peace but it is still nice to have someone there for support, especially just before the Op. With a friend I am also less likely to duck out!!!!!! Lol.

I guess it all depends on how you feel about it all hun. I am very excited but also a little nervous and may need my friend to hold my hand and give me some positive words before I go in. xxx

awww thank you so much for your support and advice ladies I really needed to make my mind up I must admit some of your stories of husbands passing out , and partners not being good at looking after you made me laugh as I have been in the same boat many times and know exactly what you ladies are on about lol, well I have decided to go alone and if I feel lonely ill try and update you girls from dolan park ; ) xx

we're all here to chat with you anytime divadust, you will be resting, sleeping and watching tv most of the time anyway, don't fret. Ur loved ones are only a phone call away if u need them..... and yes, i agree with the other girls..... if you need a member of staff for anything, ring that flaming bell!!! You've paid a lot of money and will need to be cared for. Where ru having ur surgery? I went to dolan park and they couldn't do enough for me, put me totally at ease xxxx

Hi diva,
We've made the same decision- and the other ladies comments about OH being useless is probably true- my hubby wasn't great during the labour of our kids!! It was him being sick when I was contracting!! Lol!!
I think this is something for us- and although need the support... We can do it!!! You must be soooo excited now!!!!
x

I'm going Dolan Park to sweetie I don't believe its actually really, I MEAN REALLY GOING TO HAPPEN :)))) I cant stop smiling to my self I feel like a naughty school girl, Just a little worried that I'll feel lonely or be left in pain all night as I'm mrs shy.com thats all

bless you darling, they're amazing at dolan park hun, lovely people. be brave and ring that buzzer. I just got out of bed and wandered out into the corridor when i needed something!! Its quiet and relaxed, not hustle and bustle. You will be fine sweet. I had an amazing time. Let me know how you get on, i'll be thinking of you!!

xxx

hey ! Debsrich I'm in a state of disbelieve I'm exited I keep thinking of the worst to happen to me BA going wrong , or the THG cancelling on me or me being conned ie the surgeon takes the money and makes a run for it lol nothing ever has gone my way before and I feel like something any time any minuet will brake this happiness of mine

Amy my lovely your such a sweetie bless your heart :) I feel so much more at ease knowing that you have gone there and your al right thank you for takeing time out of your resting time to reply to me your an angel mwah, ohh just wondering do you know what time youll be checking out ?

yes, ur check out time will be 24 hours after ur check in time. Although i had my check in at 11am, saw my surgeon the next day at 7am on his rounds, he was happy and said i could go there and then!! Always here if you need a chat xxx ps, I'm a worrier too, i'm now soooooo happy that i've convinced myself i'm going to capsular contraction and my boobs will be spoilt, and my new positive mood!! Honey, ur day IS going to happen. Sometimes good things do happen hun, u sound like a lovely girl and i'm sure this is only what you deserve. Relax and enjoy ur moment

xxxx

Hey Sweet,

I am going in on my own. Several reasons and circumstances being factors, but it's just the first bit to get through and then you're all zonked and sleepy anyway! I'm going in as a day case and my Mum is taking time off work to come and accompany me in a cab home (she doesn't drive) and then she'll probably just leave me to sleep. I was feeling quite down about being alone before, but thanks to the girls on here I realised that it's actually not a bad way of doing it at all! Can check in and out with you all on here and the peace and quiet will be BLISS. I'm staying at my Mums as she lives near the hospital and we live 2.5 hours away, but if she wasn't nearby then I'd stay overnight at the hospital and just make the most of the rest and the care from the nurses :)

Also, not having hubby fussing over me and waking me up every 5 minutes to ask if I'm ok will be lovely. Bless him, but no. So annoying!

Jojo - LMAO at your husband!! He sounds as bad as mine. Wimps!!

I went on my own and I was fine, it would have been difficult to have anyone with me as the hospital was over 3 hours away and I stayed two nights!! I have two young kids so to be honest I was quite happy for some peace & quiet! I loved it, I took lots of magazines, books and my Ipod and just enjoyed my time there. The staff will look after you xx

I went in by myself and BF picked me up after the op, but I was only in the surgiplex for about 3 hours altogether, so was very out of it the whole time. After the op at home though I had him with me for the first 48 hours because of the general anesthesia.

I think you'll be fine with just the nurses at the hospital, if you don't want someone around who annoys you - that's their job so they'll know best how to take care of you.

But you definitely need someone at home for the first couple of days at least, in my opinion.

Good luck hun - not long now!!

xxx

ali

Well after all I have said, It looks like I may be going in on my own too as my friend has just got a new job which means she can't make it. :( However, reading all your positive stories of going on your own, i feel absolutely fine about it! thank you xxx

My fella is coming with me and he's been brill all the way through! But in the nicest way possible I want him to clear off while i have the last words with my surgeon as I want to push for 460's instead of 410's and David said the 380's were big enough!!

As for bothering the staff I wouldn't be too concerned! Thats what they're there for afterall! And as a nurse myself it makes my day go a little quicker if people keep me on my toes :D

i went alone for my surgery and am glad i would of been more anxious i think with a friend there and after instead of feeling i had to entertain someone i could just sleep and reply to messages when i was with it, i have a little boy so a night away was lovely lol xx

He he, yes a night away from my 3 little ones will be lovely! I think if you go alone you just kinda get on with it. Though Anything is better than taking my hubby, bless him xxx

Hi

I went on my own and whilst I was worried about that, it was the right decision. I think I would have got more stressed and emotional if someone had gone with me.

Also, you don't need to worry about asking the nurses for help - in my experience they were constantly asking me if I was OK/wanted a drink/wanted food/wanted oxygen/wanted pain killers/was too hot, cold etc.

Everyone is really really nice and you will be sleepy and tired so don't need anyone, just enjoy the rest!

xx

I think its one of those things that differ with each person, I know i couldnt go on my own I would feel much more comfortable with hubby being there, whereas like alot of you girls you are more comfortable going on your own. Im just a wimp so need hubby there! lol

I will be taking my boyfriend as im so scared. He has been amazing. He came to every conseltation and has taken time off work after the op to look after me. But as welshvicci123 said it depends on the person. You may enjoy the peace. If you are nervous tho I would take someone. xxxx

I went on my own, I didn't want to but my partner was looking after our children at home so I had to really, I didn't want anyone else with me.

I was really nervous and I'm quiet too, but it was totally fine and I wasn't in any rush to go home in the end! The staff are used to dealing with nervous patients and you're paying alot to be looked after, I know with me they kept coming in to check on me and take blood pressure and stuff, I never needed to ring the bell as they were so attentive anyway.
You'll be fine. xx

yeah i only pressed the bell as i got told not to go toilet together and i needed to wee lol xx