Boobie hating man!!

Hi ladies,
so far (fingers crossed) I can say I have had a pretty easy ride of this boob job experience. My boobs r healin well, I have absolutely no pain any more n haven't since day four, they look even n r healin together nicely, n have softened quite alt already!!

However, there is one major problem I now have!! My partner has expressed from the beginnin that he was very against me havin my ba, n although his opinion means alot to me, I felt I was gonna get it done ne way cos it was about my self confidence etc etc. I never realised that once I had got my new boobies he wud still b so against them. We haven't been intimate since my op n wen I asked him y he blatantly told me that he doesn't like fake boobs n no longer finds me attractive :-( he has also been sayin negative things bout other parts of my body I.e that I shud really keep on top of shavin my legs now I've spent all this money on my boobs else it's a waste???? Well I'm jus a bit confused really!! I no it's a LONG shot but has ne other ladies out there experienced this or have I jus chose to b wit a premium example of a idiot???

M xxxxx

ohhh hun!!! i really think ghe is threatened by your boobs n ew found confidence, please pay no attention to hi stupid jibes...he is trying to make you feel insecure...and you know why?! most likely, ashe is threatened, he is prob imaging you running off with a guy with ripped abs etc...imagine it in reverse...if he went away for a day or so n came back with a hot bod...ide be terrifed that ll women r going to be aftr him n eventually he will giv n and cheat. Now im guessing this is the reason. So if i was you, i would sit down with him n ask him for the real reason...and let him no that your not planning on runnign off with anyone...seriously..i bet this is why ghe is sooo against them!!! He really shouldnt be saying things like he doesnt find u attractive etc...whatever!! thats a big lie!! when he says that say tyhat he should be with you for who you are, not just what you lok like n say you r dissapointed in him. he just needs reasurance....i really feeel for you..good luck, let me know what happens!!

Well said Jen, I completely agree! Meggiemoo I think thats horrible he is treating you like that, you had every right to get your boobs for you and he should respect that. I hope he smartenes up quick!

I can't really add any more to whats already been said, remember why you had your BA, it was for you not him. I think he probably now feels threatened that you will gain self confidence and run off and leave him. Can I ask how long you've been together? My OH (who is about to be an ex this week and not due to my BA) was good about my BA he said I had to do whatever made me happier and that's what I did. Fingers crossed it's only a temporary situation and he soon realises how his behaviour is making you feel x

Aww no. U know all guys like boobs no matter fake or wat.
He might feel like hel lose u. My ex/bf (confusing) tried to get a day off fir my op...wants ro be there etc and keeps on telling that he's worried guys will use me etc.

aw honey, im sorry hes behaving so horribly?
Have you been together a long time? Sounds like its on its way out :o(

He sounds like he's being really horrible, so one thing about your appearance changes and he thinks he can blatently say to your face he doesn't find you attractive anymore? That's not on AT ALL!
He probably is insecure but it's not ok to try and make you feel bad this way. I don't know what to say, but he should have your best interests at heart, but it doesn't sound like he does. x

A person falls in love with the personality and not how someone looks. If he is being that pathetic, turn your back and walk away as he doesn't love you. Someone who loves you would NEVER say that.

sometimes when guys feel threatened they say the most stupid and sometimes hurtful stuff. some guys just dont know how to express their emotions so just go about it the worst way possible. i wouldnt say to give up on him, theres a reason youre with him- so show him why you want to be with him and only him. everyone loves a compliment!!! itll make him feel more secure.glad to hear your boobs are doing well

he sounds insecure to me! Xx

My husband has got insecure since my ba, he has been completely over the top telling me I'm beautiful etc, he also keeps pointing out things about himself he wants to change. I def think it can make men insecure but hunny he has been down right nasty to you. To say he dosent find you attractive anymore is really mean. If your in love then you love that person regardless of new boobs, weight gain or loss etc.

I'm sorry hunny,try and talk it through but done let get you down about something you have always wanted to do. Big hugs x

I agree wtih everything that's been said, but I think it's really mean of him to put you down just because he may be feeling insecure. Every woman deserves a man that makes her feel special and beautiful no matter how they look. If he doesn't like fake boobs then find a man who will think you're fantastic as you are! I know that may be easier said than done but if he continues stripping your confidence just to match his own you'll only feel worse in the long run. Tell him to get over himself ..I bet you look fantastic!! x

It sounds like hes worried your gonna run off and leave him now that you have your new boobs. I've heard of men acting like this before cos they think their OH won't find them as attractive and/or can do better now they have boobs and more confidence. I would explain that your not gonna do this but if he still keeps being nasty then I would think your better off without him. x

OMG! (I didn't shave my legs for days after my BA cos I didn't feel up to it! ) I agree with all the ladies that say his behaviour stems from insecurity. But saying those things to you is unacceptable. If someone is no longer attracted to their partner they should deal with it or leave, not make the partner feel bad. I would say sniping comments like that verge on abusive - I should know, my dad used to knock my mum around (until he left) and he would always say nasty things to make her feel bad about herself - it's just the same as physical abuse, except the damage isn't visible. I would seriously consider whether you want to be with this guy or whether he can honestly be man enough to face his own fears and treat you honestly and decently. I hope it work out for you babes & like Lovely@41 says, I bet it's just because you now look more gorgeous than ever before! x

Well said Kookie! I've been there and can recognise the signs, Verbal negativity chips away at you more than you realise at the time. Anyway what's sexy about an insecure man! Plenty of good guy's out there who will lurve Meggiemoo1's new boobies. xx

Ignore him, hes being a pig! Like the girls have said hes just an insecure fool, and hes being cruel. Enjoy your boobs babe, theyre YOURS x

MMmmmm i think he has turned into the green eyed JEALOUS MONSTER !!!!! All because of your hot new body hunny.

when i was with my ex and i mentioned my re-op he was like NO WAY you dont need it...lol.
we have 2 x kids together so are still friends and i told him other day i was going for re-op and he would have to have kids. "oh" came the reply....i take it your going up a size then???

yes i said prob to an E cup,
he replied, ohhhhhhhh they will look lovely on you, can i have a feel when you get them done.....pmsl (how they change eyyy??)

see what you can work out with him- well thats if you think he is worth it.

if not then im sure youll have the men queing up if hes not intrested/worthy x

Thanku so so so much ladies for ur advice n opinions, it's really given me the perspective of how the outside world sees my relationship!! I have a daughter wit him n have been wit him 2 n half years so not long really but I feel some kind of loyalty to him for givin me my daughter, so wud never leave!!

He came home from work tonite n was quite nice towards my boobs, even seemed a little interested in them, which was nice!! Wen I had a bath, he washed my back n obviously saw my boobs for the first time without a bra on n e made a comment about how large they were. I sed "I thought u liked big boobs?" n he replied "wen ave I ever sed I liked big boobs?" hhmmmm I think I jus assumed he did. He also sed they looked stuck on so I had to explain to him that I'm only 1 week po ATM n it will take a while for them to settle. He disnt say owt bk to this but hey, suppose it's a little improvement.

Thanks again ladies, m XXXXXXX

arrr hes coming round to the idea by the sound of it. x

Wow I'm so so sorry! He is definitely insecure and a little jealousy can be a good thing, but he's crossed the line into being cruel and verbally abusive. You might want to get the point across to him that if he does get left by you it's because of how he's treating you not bc of your surgery! He's causing the thing he's afraid of! I hope for your sake he straightens up!!! May need to put your foot down...

**just read your update!!! It sounds like maybe he's getting used to the idea! Hope he stays sweet!!
:flowers:

I had my Husbands full support when I went for my BA, I was a AA (Smaller if there was a size) and he always knew that it was for me that i wanted this, never the less he gave me the thumbs up.

3 weeks on and he still wont come near me... I posted on here my concerns, so after a good talk with him he said that he was afraid that if he touched me they might bust. (Bless his cotton socks)

I had got myself so wound up that I had us marching to the divorce courts, cause of seperation... The Double D's!!!

Chin up hun, men are just like kids, and need to be the centre of attention, and everything is about them! Dont let anyones attitude spoil your enjoyment of finally having what you always wanted xxx

sounds like he is coming round to it, but try n reasure him that it doesnt change who u r n ur not gona run off with someone else.... i think that was prob it hun. glad things r looking up, please please keep us updated!! xx

It was really sweet of him to wash your back, maybe he's not such a bad guy and just needs to adjust to the new you.xx

OMG I cant believe he's started being like that with you hun! My BF said he'd still love and look at me the same if i had to have my breasts removed or a limb removed or something. God forbid anything like that will ever happen!

I think he genuinely cant handle the fact that you've had this done to build your confidence (its probably showing) and I think Jen is right he feels threatened. I'd call his bluff and tell him you will leave him then if he no longer finds you attractive - im sure there's a million guys out there who would love to have a gorgeous girl like you on their arm.

I hope he comes to his bloody senses soon! x