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Doubts

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Doubts

Post by LindaP on 29th March 2016, 6:15 pm

Hi,

I am having some serious doubts about my surgery. I am trying to figure out if it is just nerves or if it is something more serious. I have been thinking about cancelling but will leave it at least a week before making any final decision either way. 

Basically it scares me that this is so permanent. I realise I can have the implants out in the future if I wanted to but I could never completely go back if you see what I mean. I am also questioning if it is worth it. I am not one of those people who hates my boobs and feel embarrassed about my body. My boobs aren't too bad, they're just not what I ideally want. The question is then how much is it worth to look good? And how much happier will I be from having bigger boobs? The sensible thing for me to do at this stage in life would be to save up to buy my own home or something, not get plastic surgery. 

It also doesn't help that I don't feel like I can tell people about it. Not so much because I'm worried about reactions but I actually feel a bit embarrassed. And if I feel too embarrassed to tell people does this mean I will be too embarrassed to show off my new boobs when I have them?

I realise most people go though doubts at this stage of the process and I am trying to figure out if I am just having some normal doubts or whether this is actually not the right thing for me to do. I am not particularly bothered about losing the deposit and other money I've spent so far. That money is spent regardless if I go though with surgery or not and if I decide to cancel that will have just been an expensive way of making a very informed decision.

I don't really want to be convinced either way but I would be grateful for any thoughts

xx
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Re: Doubts

Post by KC94 on 29th March 2016, 6:32 pm

I feel exactly the same right now. I have one more consultation and then I plan to book, but I'm terrified I'll regret it as my family have told me they're not too happy about it, so right now I'm spending more time crying about it than feeling excited. It's a whirl wind of emotions!
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Re: Doubts

Post by BkozK on 29th March 2016, 6:52 pm

It's been a long wait and now the time is drawing nearer I can understand you going through these worries. I can't tell you what to do. You have to think back to the start of all your researching and consults, why did you want to do this? Has that changed??? Your reasoning for maybe not having them done is sensible, a home is a big investment, one that is definately necessary at some point in your life unless you want to rent forever (which some prople do prefer to do). I know a number of women that had BAs prior to children so if that's an issue on your mind, it's not caused them any troubles. But your young and you have time. I too did hate my boobs, and at your age I wouldn't have thought about a boob job, it wasn't till after children and the battering my body had taken that I decided to go for it. My belly can be worked on with exercise but I can't regroup boobs was my thinking and I an so glad I did. I wish you luck in what ever you choose to do. Xx
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Re: Doubts

Post by BkozK on 29th March 2016, 6:54 pm

Dang it, that should have been *didnt hate my boobs*
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Re: Doubts

Post by BkozK on 29th March 2016, 6:55 pm

Doh and that's *regrow* lol x
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Re: Doubts

Post by Mammamia on 29th March 2016, 7:17 pm

I think you're being really wise and you're taking everything into consideration so you will make a good choice that's right for you. I actually think its really admirable that you're prepared to walk away if you come to that decision.

For me, I always hated my boobs but they didn't really impact my life. I was always happy in life regardless and they didn't occupy many of my thoughts. I'd always joked about getting a boob job but in reality I never thought seriously about it as I didn't think it was a real option.

Then I got to 35, had settled, finished having children, was comfortable financially and had a small windfall from work. At the same time I learned of a friend of a friend who'd had one and all of a sudden I realised it wasn't somethjng off limits that only the celebs or glamour girls could do. Decided to do something for me not because I thought it would change my life, but just because I facnied having bigger boobs!! Bit radical I guess but if it went wrong I'd have them out and be ok with that (it's what nature gave me after all!). I LOVE them but it hasn't changed my life. I still don't like wearing skimpy tops (it's just not me) and I still don't parade my baps around the bedroom (also it me!!). I'm slightly self conscious that they are fake when touched but I try to ignore this.  Im not embarrassed but would rather keep it to myself rather than telling people. I'm glad I had it done as I look better, but I don't regret not doing it when younger as like I said, my lack of boobs before didn't consume me. It just kind of fell into place.

There's a lot to weigh up. Probably just normal nerves but if you are unsure you have time/age on your side xx
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Re: Doubts

Post by Lucy106 on 29th March 2016, 9:18 pm

Exactly the same as mammamia!!

Firstly it is totally normal to have a wobble at this stage and wonder what the hell you are doing - I did!! Secondly I think if you've come this far now then you will now always wonder 'what if' if you don't get it done and the chances are you will revisit and probably have this done later in life!

I had always wanted it done but never seriously - it was a pipe dream. When I was younger I couldn't have justified spending the money but on the flip side I so wish I'd had this done years ago!! Can't win!

At the age of 37 I have children, a home, my own company and I'm financially secure. I can afford to have it done without really sacrificing any part of my life. Like mammamia I wasn't hideously ashamed of my boobs but I thought - what the heck, I have the money, I want something new - I'll get me a pair of boobs!! And I also had a direct recommendation of a surgeon from a friend which really gave me the final push!

Like you I was nervous I would not feel able to show them off but they just look like me without a push-up bra. Maybe a bit bigger but so far no one has commented! I still wear my usual vest tops and don't feel self conscious!

You do whatever you think is best but I do think you will revisit it later in life if you do decide to cancel!! That's not such a bad thing - some would say sensible, however like I say - ask most girls on here and they will say they wished they'd done it sooner!!

Xxx
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Re: Doubts

Post by LindaP on 29th March 2016, 9:53 pm

Thank you for your comments. It really helps just to hear a different perspective. At the moment I am leaning towards going ahead but over the last few days it feels like I keep changing my mind all the time. I have decided to give it a bit more time and I will also try to tell just a few more people, just close friends and family. Not because I want their reactions but to see how I feel saying it out loud and telling people about it. I don't want to feel embarrassed about wanting a boob job and I know I have no reason to be embarrassed about it.

Thank you for being supportive and sharing your thoughts xxx
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Re: Doubts

Post by Mammamia on 30th March 2016, 5:34 am

Sounds good! But don't feel that you have to tell people, many don't tell anyone and your boobs are private after all. Men wouldn't tell you about a penis extension (if they could get one!!). Just be certain you're doing it for the right reasons (for you) and then I'm sure you won't regret it. But there is nothing wrong with revisiting the idea when your older/richer/past caring what others think!/post kids xx
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Re: Doubts

Post by LindaP on 30th March 2016, 9:32 pm

I am feeling a lot more positive today. It is crazy how much my nerves are playing up now that it is all getting so real. I am still doing some thinking but right now I feel more excited than nervous or doubtful.
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Re: Doubts

Post by Lucy106 on 31st March 2016, 11:27 am

Oh good that's great news!! I was the same don't worry! X
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Re: Doubts

Post by BkozK on 31st March 2016, 6:37 pm

Glad your feeling more at ease today, hope the good feeling continues.. It's a roller coaster of emotions isn't it, But the best part once your through the op is beautiful boobs and pretty bras ;-) xx
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Re: Doubts

Post by LindaP on 1st April 2016, 8:46 pm

I told my mum about getting surgery and she took it reasonably well. Her reaction was sort of what I expected, she doesn't approve and thinks I'm good enough the way I am but she respects my decision and trusts that I have done my research. I will speak to her about it more on Skype tomorrow (we live in different countries).

It is a bit funny though as she first asked if it was an April fools joke. I think she might have hoped it would be.

Either way I feel good for having told her. It is something I was nervous about both because I knew she wouldn't really like it and because we don't tend to talk a lot about private things like that. I love my mum and we do talk a lot but not about everything. I think I am properly back to being really excited now. :)
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Re: Doubts

Post by BkozK on 1st April 2016, 9:20 pm

Ah that great that you've told your mum. Bet that's a weight off your mind. I found my mum to be the hardest. X
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Re: Doubts

Post by Lucy106 on 2nd April 2016, 7:06 am

I still haven't told my mum!! I've seen my parents lots since I had the op and they haven't said anything but my husband said he finds it hard to believe they wouldn't have noticed as there is quite a difference (I don't think there is but he said they def look bigger to the outside world). I'm going on a cruise with my mum in summer so I'm sure she will definitely notice but she might not say anything. At the moment I don't have any intention of telling them but I guess I will play it by ear! 

Glad u feel happier now you've told your mum! X
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Re: Doubts

Post by Mammamia on 4th April 2016, 2:05 pm

Glad you're back to being excited!
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Re: Doubts

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